I’ve taken to doing two blog posts at a time, because I never feel done, and I always see another song I want to do a post on.
So in keeping with that, here’s my second blog post of the day
This song always makes me think of the quote by Sylvia Plath “the day came when the risk to remain in a tight bud, was greater than the risk is took to bloom” or along those lines
Baby was the main character, I was backstage, she was my Sasha Fierce, she took over, and I’d hide behind her.
“When the road has been too lonely and the road has been too long, and you think that love is only for the lucky and the strong. Just remember in the winter, far beneath the bitter snow. Lies the seed that with the suns love, in the spring, becomes the rose.”
I think is one of the most beautiful lines to be honest. It takes time, and nurture, but love and life is possible.
There’s another quote about even when I don’t see the sun, I know it’s there. And that’s all that matters, knowing that its there’s and possible and that it exists, I’m not doing that quote justice I’ll look for it.
“I can see the sun, but even if I cannot see the sun, I know that it exists. And to know that the sun is there - that is living.” - Fyodor Dostoyevsky, 'The Brothers Karamazov'.
Anyway what I’m trying to say, talking In riddles as usual, very disjointedly, is that once I had social anxiety, and what I didn’t know was a suffocating identity disorder. And I was struggling to bloom. And for me? It took a decade, twelve to twenty two.
It involved mental illness after mental illness, including anorexia depression psychosis and dissociative amnesia.
And after all that - was it worth it to truly be myself? Yes, always
Choose yourself. Stop holding your breath. Breathe. Live.